When your child misbehaves at school

Every parent dreads it when their child’s school contacts them during school hours, because it can never be good news. When Reuben’s teacher called me, I nervously picked up the phone, wondering what it could be.

“What’s wrong?” I asked. “Don’t worry, Reuben is fine,” was the first thing he said. My relief lasted only a brief moment. “OK…then what’s really wrong?” I asked, frowning.

Let’s just say Reuben was in serious trouble when he got home, and I spent most of the afternoon stewing in anger. I should also mention at this point that my son is not in entering the phase of teenage rebellion but he is, in fact, just a pre-schooler, and already I’ve been summoned to a “chat” with his teachers.

Many of you may not have this experience, and I hope that is the case. But bad behavior when your child is not under your watch is inevitable, and comes in many different forms. If you should get the dreaded call, or be summoned to the principal’s office, here’s how to take it in stride.

1. Understand the issue from all angles.

Sometimes your child was provoked, and while that doesn’t excuse inappropriate behavior, it gives you insight into what he was thinking and feeling. Use these insights when you talk to him later at home. If there were other children involved, respect that the teacher may not always tell you the identity of the other children. Be a responsible parent though, and enquire whether the other children were hurt by the behavior of your child.

2. Consider what is age-appropriate behavior for your child.

At pre-school age, be mindful that you are dealing with a child who is still learning social skills and understanding authority. There are times when his sheer childishness means he will not judge situations with clear eyes. Take heart that at this age, it is totally normal that your child seems to misbehave on a daily basis as he learns to navigate his social environment.

3. Talk, talk, talk.

Walk through the whole incident with your child, and get him to understand why his behaviour was not appropriate. Depending on his age, a lot of it can be quite bewildering. Acknowledge his feelings, but always draw on your family values, taking the time to reiterate them.

4. Work closely with your child’s teacher.

Good teachers will want to work with you and keep you in the loop. Think of it as a collaboration. Focus on coming up with an action plan with the teachers, and do your part by reinforcing the ideas at home. During the morning drive to school, I would spend a few minutes reminding Reuben about how to handle different situations at school. Because his teachers and I were working in tandem, we saw results quickly—and a much happier child!

from: https://ph.she.yahoo.com/when-your-child-misbehaves-at-school-034902091.html

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